Do Psychopaths Really Understand Emotions?

I didn't pick the title... blame the guy that wrote the article

Do you feel like you have seen a wheel like that in previous posts? Well, you sort of did, the last one was more of a flower. This one is more… involved…

So, I found this article that asked the question, “Do psychopaths really understand emotions” with the subheading of, “It may depend on their childhood”. I have no idea if I agree with this or not, I have to read his argument, however, the first thing that came to mind when seeing the title was, “Do neurotypicals really understand emotions?” I don’t intend to rile anyone up with that question, but I have seen, many times in my life, mind you, neurotypicals be totally confused by their own emotions. If they don’t understand them, and they are the ones primarily responsible for raising the psychopaths of the world, the answer to the author’s question is a resounding, no.

Psychopaths can only learn about the world of emotional experience by observing and learning from the neurotypicals around us. We, of course, understand things like interest, or contentedness, or happiness, intrigue, etc., but the rest of it, not a clue. Until we get to a certain point of development, most of the neurotypical emotional experience is just words to us. It takes time to understand that, not only are these things real, not just stuff that they say is real, but they have a large and lasting impact on the neurotypical experience.

Actually, let’s look at that color wheel. You’re right, I lied, it is going to be in the article. Okay, I didn’t lie, I am just realizing that it might be interesting to go down a list real quick to see how different our emotional experiences are, before getting into the dude’s article.

Oh, that is so much clearer than it is in the article I nicked it from. That’s helpful. All right, starting in the middle, we have emotions that seem to subgroup off into other emotions. So, let’s look at the primary emotions, which will be in bold, and the sub-emotions which will be normal.

Proud-Self acceptance

Self-confident- to a psychopath, this is not an emotion, it is a state of mind that is consistent. There is no point in time that we lack self-confidence, so to us, this has nothing to do with any sort of emotion, but rather just how things are.

Self-Esteem- See above with self-confidence, as it is the same

Encouraged-Is this an emotion? I don’t feel encouragement or discouragement. Rather, a willingness or unwillingness to bother with something.

Empowered-Why… do you lack power in the first place? To feel empowered, you would first have to feel “without power”, and I don’t know what that really means.

Joyful-gain

Happy-Yup, I can be happy

Ecstatic-Nope, that’s too deep and long-lasting of an emotion. Not going to happen.

Excited-Sure, to a degree, though I can say for certain that it isn’t like those around me. With others, it appears to be a pretty persistent state that can even last for months. I do not have anything like that.

Grateful-Gratitude is a cognitive process for me, not an emotional one. I understand when someone does something kind for me, that I should be demonstrating gratitude, but it is not an emotion.

Intrigued-attentive

Engaged-Sure

Fascinated-I think so

Entranced-Umm…. going to look this one up to get a better idea before I answer. “fill (someone) with wonder and delight, holding their entire attention”. I don’t… think so. But maybe this world is just not magical enough to inspire that response. I’m kidding, and I don’t think that “entrancement” is possible with me.

Energetic-This is not an emotion for me. I either have energy, or I do not have energy. I have no idea why this would be an emotional thing.

Trusting-Security

Assured- I always feel this way

Hopeful-I don’t feel whatever the opposite of hopeful is, so I don’t experience the opposite of it, I guess.

Secure-Is this an emotion? I can’t feel insecure, so by default, I am secure.

Confident-Again, not an emotion for me. Just a constant state of being.

Loving-Attraction

Affectionate- Affection is a cognitive process that I have to remind myself is required in relationships, including animals. They need affection, and I do not, so I have to intentionally tell myself to pay attention to their need for affection. As I write this, there is a Bengal behind me on the couch that really really really wants me to pet her. She has this very loud, very insistent chirp that she will lean literally right into my ear and do to me. Only me. No one else gets chirped at. Why don’t they? Because she doesn’t have to scream at them, “PET ME YOU IDIOT!!!!” Like she has to with me. So, no on this one.

Adoration-Nope

Connected-Nope

Caring-Cognitive/action based

Peaceful-Acceptance

Content-Always

Relaxed-Nearly all the time

Tranquil-No idea why we need another word for the two that already covered this, but I might be missing the point, or some difference that this word has.

Harmonious-This requires me to observe and critique my meshing with others. Harmonious simply means everyone is getting on, but it isn’t an emotion for me.

Ashamed- Self-judgment

Awkward-Never

Guilty-Nope

Embarrassed- Not even a little

Humiliated-Sorry, but no

Sad-Loss

Depressed-Not possible

Pain and hurt- I mean… physical pain still sucks. I lack the emotional part of it though. If this means solely the emotional pain/hurt, that’s a no.

Grief and sorrow- Uh-uh

Unhappy- Hmm, I mean, maybe. Usually when I am not happy, I am simply content, but there are occasions that I am not content either. Such as, the loss of a pet. I can’t say that I am ever happy in that situation, and it isn’t a situation that I am content with. I suppose that could be a form of unhappiness, but I imagine that neurotypicals have a much deeper meaning behind the term, “unhappy”.

Surprised-Caught off guard

Astonished-Is this a deeper experience of surprise? I think that surprised is as deep as it goes with me.

Distracted-That is not an emotion. That is a response to, “Ooo shiny.” You can distract a baby by dangling keys in front of them. Why is this considered an “emotion”?

Startled-All humans have a startle reflex. This is a brain stem response that, unless something in your brain stem doesn’t work, you have this. Maybe there is an emotional part that psychopaths lack, but I don’t consider this an emotion. This is fight or flight, primal instinct.

Overwhelmed- I kind of think of “overwhelmed” is a physical thing. You get overwhelmed when you have the flu, a fever, a massive headache, a broken leg, and four kids screaming for breakfast. That seems like a lot to deal with. I don’t consider it an emotion, but know that neurotypicals do.

Afraid-Threat

Insecure-No

Anxious- I can’t even imagine what this feels like

Vulnerable-Why is this a feeling? It’s a reality. I am not 6’ 9 and 412 lbs of muscle. I know this about myself, and know to behave accordingly. I also know that I am not a match for the dude that fits that description, so I don’t go getting on his bad side. I don’t feel vulnerable, I know I am because my brain cells are holding hands, and I am not a dumbass.

Scared-Nope, but I do get the adrenaline response when I am in danger. No emotional response, but a physical one.

Disgusted-Repulsion

As for disgust as a whole, I had a reader that put this into an interesting perspective:

Aylin Ergün has mentioned in the comments that psychopaths may have a turned down version of disgust, and stated;

“You once wrote that you do not like balut due to the texture. It sounds like a non-emotional disgust response. Probably tuned down like other emotions, where psychopathic disgust wouldn't be "EEEEEWWWWWW GETITAWAYYYYYYYYY" but, "No. I'd rather not."”

This is quite possible that this indeed is a disgust response, but it’s an unemotional one. I think that this is a good hypothesis.

Averse-This is an action, to me, meaning, to avoid. I am averse to spending time with the guy that sh*t his pants five days ago and hasn’t had a shower or changed clothes yet.

Apathetic-This is the lack of emotion, not an emotion. Come on article, do better.

Repulsive-Shouldn’t this be, “repulsed”? Isn’t “repulsive” a description of something that is gross and needed to be avoided? Like a maggot ridden dead body, to most people, is repulsive. It isn’t an internal emotional response, it is an external descriptor. This list needed an editor. Also, not an emotion I feel.

Contempt-Contempt for me is a cognitive process. It is not something that I feel, but rather something I acknowledge in the world as being present. The murder of Junko Furuto is something that I see as contemptible action. It isn’t a feeling, but an observation.

Angry-Judgment

Frustrated-Nope

Annoyed-This is, apparently, the emotional continuation of irritation, which is a mood. A mood is an emotional precursor, or state of mind, but not an actual emotion. However, I have never considered annoyance an emotion. I consider it a response to the interruption of my preferred activity. I want to be doing A, but instead I am having to deal with B. That annoys me, but this is not an emotion, just a response to having to deal with other people.

Envious- I have never understood this emotion. All it makes me think of is the Homer Simpson quote:

I'm not jealous, I'm envious. Jealousy is when you worry someone will take what you have. Envy is wanting what someone else has. What I feel is envy.

I can’t feel jealousy either, but the distinction is interesting to me. I have never wanted what other people have. I might see something that someone has and think, that would be nice, but I never want theirs. I would simply make a plan to get my own. If that isn’t possible, I shrug and say, whatever. I have an example of this that I will link the video of in the end, but I will describe it here.

I like long hair. Men, women, doesn’t matter, I like it. My hair has a growth limitation to it that will never allow it to be super long like I like. I never look at people with long hair and want it. I recall speaking to someone who also couldn’t have the hair that they wanted, and in regard to the video I will post said, “Doesn’t it just make you want to cut it all off their head?”

What? No. Why would I ever want to do that? I can’t have it, but I can look at it and enjoy how pretty it is. Why would I take that away from myself? What is wrong with you?

Mad- I can experience anger for a flash, but it isn’t something that is abiding or long-lasting. It won’t direct behavior, either.

All right, maybe I am proving this guy’s point about psychopaths not understanding emotions, but a lot of those are just synonyms for the root word though, right? Also, and maybe I’m wrong, but a lot of these don’t really seem like emotions to me. Apathetic, for instance, seems like the opposite of an emotion, a lack of emotion, if you will. Let me know what you guys think.

Wow, we have gotten so far, and haven’t delved into this article yet. This post will likely be a two parter, but we will start on it anyway. Even if to only be consistent with the title. At the very least, we can go through his, “key points” that he listed before the body of his writing. This tends to set the mood for the rest of it.

Here’s the article link:

Do Psychopaths Really Understand Emotions? It may depend on their childhood.

Individuals with psychopathic tendencies show a lack of empathy, but they can also be charming and manipulative.

Thaaat’ssss not a point. Also, we don’t show a lack of empathy. I have no idea why these sorts of article are so dedicated to the notion that there must be emotional empathy in there somewhere. We’re just really super good at hiding it… apparently.

Also, all humans are manipulative. Please get over this idea that neurotypicals are out here being the bestest most special people on earth that never would ever imagine manipulating one another. That is all they do, every day, in every situation. Manipulation is not a bad thing, stop acting like it’s something to deny doing or that it’s what will bring the world to it’s knees in the face of corruption.

It’s simply human interaction. All human interaction. And just like all things, there is a toxic version of it. Psychopaths are nowhere near the most common users of toxic manipulation. Clean your own house before you critique others.

Low empathy could stem from low awareness of others' emotions, while manipulation skills seem to suggest high awareness of others' emotions.

*Head on desk* Yes, I know I already told you I am on a couch. It’s a saying, not a description of reality… at this exact moment. Good lord. This guy is already sliding into the terminal stage of idiocy. Hopefully he pulls himself out of it, but this is not a good statement.

First and foremost, and I cannot believe I have to say this again in only the second of his key points, we do not have emotional empathy at ALL. This seems to be such a sticking point that really shouldn’t be. I get it. Your whole neurotypical society treats empathy like it is some end all, be all emotional state that makes neurotypicals akin to gods, but that is a load of garbage if I have ever heard one.

Emotional empathy is a joke. It is nothing more than projection, which may well work a fair bit of the time, but it isn’t feeling what someone else is feeling. It is assuming that person feels like you do in whatever situation they are in, and then comforting yourself with them in your place. It’s great for social cohesion for those of you that have those emotional experiences, but the moment you meet someone that doesn’t, and those numbers are growing, your emotional empathy is as valuable as yesterday’s toilet leavings.

What psychopaths have, is cognitive empathy. We have watched the patterns of neurotypicals, watched how you make each other dance on the end of your strings, and learn what you value. We don’t feel those things, but we understand that you must, and this interaction is what works on you. We can understand that those emotions exist, that NTs feel them, that they are important, in what situations they will appear, and what they look like. What we do not, and never will understand is what those emotions feel like, and why you experience them in those situations, in the first place.

Also, as I mentioned, we learn how to “manipulate” from you guys. We learn in the Neurotypical University for Human Interaction. There is no, Psychopath U, just neurotypicals directing our behavior from day one.

A study shows lower emotional awareness in those with greater psychopathy levels, but only if they also experienced childhood abuse/neglect

…Sooo, his point here is that kids that are abused have less ability to be psychologically and emotionally well-adjusted? Umm… seriously? This is not news. If you f*ck up a kid emotionally, you… you know… f*cked them up. This statement makes him sound like the idiot I was hoping that he would come back from. Abuse changes the brain. It is difficult, perhaps it may be impossible, to actually identify a psychopath if they come from a history of severe abuse. This isn’t something that I have really considered doing some research for one of my upcoming posts having to do with NPD versus sociopathy, and the origins of each prohibiting them from coexisting.

While doing so, I contacted my friend that works with survivors of severe abuse. Very rarely do people come through that are suspected to be psychopathic, but he stated, “It’s difficult, you know? When you have someone that lives in a state of perpetual head injuries, how are you going to know that person isn’t how they are because of that, or because of how they were born?” He did state some interesting ways that they tend to differentiate between the rare possible psychopaths, versus the rare possible sociopaths in their care, but he did state that sociopathy did have a higher incidence there than in the general population, which, makes sense.

Anyway, my point here is that, if you abuse a child, you can’t be surprised that makes them less capable of understanding “normal” emotions. If the person is a psychopath, of course it’s going to have a negative impact on their ability to function in the world. Psychopaths never internalize abuse. It will be learned as a tool for use. Just like everything else we are taught, it will be weighed on the scale of effectiveness. If it is effective to get what is wanted, then it will be the tool selected. If it consistently works, why choose something else?

Also, this makes me think about my hypothesis regarding what causes sociopathy, and at what point an abused person crosses the boundary between survivor of abuse, otherwise considered “normal”, and an actual sociopath. We’ll get into that in another post.

Next key point:

Many high-psychopathy individuals without childhood abuse/neglect had high levels of emotional awareness, possibly helping them be manipulative.

Oh, sweetie. I can guarantee you that a psychopath that had an abusive childhood can still learn how to read people’s emotions. Granted, some aren’t smart enough, and others don’t see the point, but outside of those reasons, I cannot come up with one that would make it outside of a psychopath’s reach. We don’t remain stagnant very often, and learning new things is interesting to us. Also, neurotypicals, otherwise, are baffling creatures to us. They are constantly unreasonable in our eyes. A lot of us are very curious as to why that is.

All right, that was his last key point. We will tackle the article in the next post. Also upcoming, my relationship with animals, what I am like when I am no longer interested in maintaining the mask for some reason, and the NPD versus sociopathy post that is also in the works. I am going to go write the second half of this post now.

Oh, yes, I almost forgot the hair video:

Now that… is some awesome hair.